Just because it’s “working” doesn’t mean it works.
This was a lesson I learned the hard way in both my dieting and dating life.
Before getting into my first relationship, I knew I wanted to be in one, but never set standards of what that’d look like.
Similarly, in my health journey, I wanted to lose weight, but never identified how I wanted to feel while doing so.
Because of this, I ended up settling in both.
As I began to dive into my relationship issues, it was impossible to ignore how identical they were to my issues with food.
My thought process was the same. My behavior was the same. My emotional swings were the same. The way they took over my life was the same.
Just as I was prone to disappearing into any relationship I entered, I was equally likely to become engulfed in changing my diet.
Trying to make a meal plan fit into ONE part of my life was a direct reflection of how I was trying to force the men I dated to fit into another.
No matter how much evidence I had that it wasn’t working, I kept finding ways to explain it away or hide it under a series of excuses—I was so caught up in making it work long term it never occurred to me it wasn’t working even in the short term.
But when I became aware of the parallels, I couldn’t unsee them; they were everywhere.
From that moment on, I was determined to break the patterns in both areas of my life.
I worked through my issues with food and with relationships, first untangling them from one another and then picking them apart in terms of how I’d been taught to interact with them.
After I spent time defining my values and uncovering what was important to me, I realized I deserve better and stopped settling, in both.
If you say things like —
– He only gets annoyed with me when I ask too many questions
OR
– I only get hangry once a day
-He doesn’t get along with any of my family and friends so I keep them separate
OR
-The stress of trying to stick to my meal plan at a restaurant is too much, so I avoid going out with friends and family
-We used to be so happy and in love. It must be me. I just need to work harder
OR
– I used to be able to stick to this. It must be me. I need to work harder
– At least we’re not as bad as..(insert unhealthy relationship couple here)
OR
– At least I can eat some carbs, unlike my co-worker who’s miserable on Keto.
–STOP SETTLING! You deserve a life filled with quality and true love.
With Lots Of Healthy Love,
Toni
